The elaboration of relationship connections

  • Why does it bother you who I love?

    Let’s talk about it…

    Linda has spent the last ten years defending her choice of who she chooses to love. She is a thirty-year-old single, openly gay female. She works as a full-time receptionist for a dental office and part-time as a bartender for a local bar. She is five feet nine inches with long legs. She has an hourglass shape and loves to dress very dainty and sexy; yet classy. Linda do not wear her sexuality on her sleeve; neither does she hide from people. Because of her beauty, she is constantly approached by men asking her out on a date or for her phone number. Many of the men take it personal when she tells them that she only date women. Some men go as far to call her names or ask her inappropriate personal questions. Approximately one year ago, someone has been hacking into Linda’s social media accounts posting derogatory things about gay people. Although Linda has closed her social media accounts; she hasn’t been able to clear her name. To remain sane and sound mind, Linda made the decision to counsel with a psychologist who happens to be a member of her grandparents’ church. Because Linda’s part-time evening job is closed on Mondays, she scheduled her counseling sessions for 4:00pm on Mondays.

    “Hello Linda, how are you today?” “Hi Dr. Gordon, I am well.” “Have a seat on the couch, I made some notes from our phone consultation and would like to start our session today with a few questions.” “Sounds good Dr. Gordon, I’m open to the process.” “On the phone you stated that you are an openly gay woman.” “Yes, I did state that.” “What is openly gay in your perspective, Linda?” “As an openly gay women, I walk in my truth. I do not wear a sign saying that I am gay. However, whenever a man approaches me for my phone number or ask me out on a date or when one of my female friends tries to fix me up with one of their male friends, I let them know that I only date women because I am gay.” “What type of backlash do you receive when telling someone you are gay?” “Many of my female friends are okay with me stating I am gay. They continued to be my friend without any change in our relationship. There is those handful of female friends who suddenly doesn’t want to be friends with me anymore because; and I quote, “I am uncomfortable being around you” is what they say to me. The men all become very angry with me. Many show their angry by asking me derogatory questions or by making derogatory comments.” “Linda, what do you say to the women who states they are uncomfortable being around you after finding out your sexuality?” “I tell them, “You do not have to worry, I’m not a flirtation woman or a pervert that goes around wanting all women in a sexual way. I have a partner who I am dating. I do not say anything to the men because I fear for my safety when they are boldly making derogatory comments. I now carry pepper spray and have a 22-caliber handgun in my home.” “Linda I can see, you are a very confident intelligent person. I believe I know the answer to my next question; however, I need you to confirm. Why did you choose me to counsel with you?” “You are a man. You are a Christian who goes to my grandparents’ church. And you are a psychologist.” “Thanks for the confirmation, Linda. I felt, after our phone conversation, you are looking to receive insight on how men think from a male perspective. And you are looking to receive biblical insight on why believers are uncomfortable being around a gay person. You feel safe talking to me because of my relationship with your grandparents.” “Yes, Dr. Gordon; you are correct in your observation.” “Linda, a man is his ego and his possession. Seventy percent of how men react to life events is with their ego. The other thirty percent of how men react to life events is possessions based; what they own. If someone say something or do something that stroke the male ego in a possible way, he shows it with a positive respond. When the ego has been bruise, it is met with negativity from the man. No fault of yours; however, the men perceived your reply to him asking for your phone number or to go out on a date with him as a rejection that bruise his ego. Especially when the rejection is subliminal articulated to say, “I don’t like men or you”. Men do not walk around with the same understanding or compassion that women have. Therefore, his only recourse to combat his bruise ego was to hurt the emotional side of you as a female with his derogatory comments.” “Dr. Gordon, how do you think, I should have handled the questions from men without bruising their egos.” “Linda, it’s okay to walk in your truth with confident and without shame. I don’t think you need to share the details of your truth to close minded people. Heterosexual people do not respond to the same questions by saying I am in a relationship with the opposite sex: a male or female. They simply say I am in a relationship. Try using that statement with your next encounter to see how it works for you. You shouldn’t have to walk around in fear carrying pepper spray or sleeping next to a handgun.”

    “Dr. Gordon, that explains why the men response to me the way they do; but, what about the women who no longer feels comfortable around me once I tell them I am gay.” “Linda, women are more likely to believe in the principles taught in church, by their parents or grandparents regarding God’s Word or the bible. It doesn’t matter if the women go to church or not. They are more prone to believe in some type of biblical principles; even if they do not fully understand the principle they are following. The discussion of Homosexuality has always been a taboo in the church. The topic is swiftly mentioned whenever the preacher teaches on Sodom and Gomorrah. The preacher normally points out God anger for the type of sin rather than for the sin itself. Which led people to believe there is a hierarchy to the type of sin. People tend to believe they would be destroyed in the same manner as Sodom and Gomorrah if they are among homosexuals. We all have a right to live within our belief. As you stated, there is only a handful of women who no longer wants to be around you once you tell them you are gay. Respect their wishes and continued to live your life as you please. No one must answer to God for someone else sin. Hopefully as these women grow in their relationship with God, so will their understanding in not judging people because they sin differently from how they sin. I’m not personally saying your way of living is a sin. I’m simply saying it not my responsibility to determine if you are living in sin due to your sexuality. I am here to show you Godly love without judgement. This doesn’t mean that I do not fruit inspect a person’s character to see if I want to associate with a person or not. Linda, I hope today’s counseling session has help you.” “Yes Dr. Gordon, you have help me tremendously. I would love to continue our sessions. Okay Linda, I will see you next week at the same time.”

    Linda felt so empowered after her first session with Dr. Gordon. She decided to write a song called “Why does it bother you who I love?”

    “Why does it bother you who I love? You don’t own the world or have created its inhabitants; can we just all get alone? There is more than enough space to not cross or trample on the path of each other’s beliefs. God created male and female in the image of love; if you feel I have stepped outside of love into darkness, then be a light to guide me back with love. I’m not asking you to follow me or approve my decisions; I am simply saying if your light is shining bright, darkness cannot dominate it. When you verbally or physically attack me for being different; which one of us is walking in darkness? So, I ask again: why does it bother you who I love?”

    After two months of weekly counseling, the tools and advise given by Dr. Gordon have been life changing. Linda has noticed a change in people interactions towards her.  The derogatory comments or questions from men has stopped. No longer are female friends disassociating themselves from her. When she introduces her partner to people, they are met with warm greetings. Linda realized with the help of Dr. Gordon, that she was receiving an energy from people that she was unbeknown giving to people. Linda has a new song in her heart called love.

    “Love is patient; love is kind; it does not envy; it does not boast; it is not proud; it is not rude; it is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs; it does not delight in evil; it rejoices with the truth; it always protects; it always trusts; it always hopes; it always perseveres and it never fails. Let the light of love shine within our hearts; so that people would see our good works and glorify our Father which is in heaven.”

    https://bookofrelationship.com

  • Henry the Moocher

    My male friend think that I am Motel 6, the Grocery Store, his Chauffeur, his Maid and a Short order cook. Do I look like your mama? WTF.

    Let’s talk about it…

    “Cherise, I understand your need to explore the world now that you are eighteen, I just don’t think the military is the way to be adventurous in the world especially when troops are still being deployed to battle in other countries. Can you give college one more try? You just might enjoy it this time. Entering college at the age of seventeen immediately after graduating high school early may have been too soon for you.” “Mom, college is not for me at this time in my life. It doesn’t mean I will never consider going in the future. Besides, like I told you previously, I prayed about me joining the military; I am at peace with going; my spirit is at peace.” “Okay, Cherise, I have always taught you to pray before making major decisions in life and to listen to the voice of God as you spend time in his presence during meditation. I now must trust in what you received. You have my blessings.” “Thanks Mom, that means a lot to me.”

    Cherise is Helen’s oldest daughter. She has always been a smart student with high energy. Throughout her years in school, Cherise teachers would constantly complain about her needing to learn how to use her idle time more productively. Cherise would finish class assignments long before time was up; she would use idle time to talk to other students as they were trying to complete the assignment before the time was up. Despite her parents and the teachers encouraging Cherise to read in silent when she finishes her work before the other students; she continued to disturb others. To Cherise, school was boring. She always talked about doing adventurous things like sky diving or rock climbing. As Helen reminisce on Cherise’s childhood, she understands why her daughter chose to join the military. Without doubt Helen knew that the military would provide the adventure her daughter so desperately seeks; her prayer is that Cherise finds a sense of balance with the strict disciple required from soldiers in the military.

    Cherise enlisted in the Army. Within two weeks after enlisting, she was sent to the base in North Carolina. Cherise would call home weekly to update her mom on life in the army. One year after enlisting, Cherise received deployment orders. She was scheduled to deploy to Afghanistan after the year-end holidays. Cherise spent Christmas and New Years at home with family. Upon returning to the base in North Carolina, she was prep for deployment. During Cherise’s one year assignment in Afghanistan, she often talked about her friend Henry. Henry and Cherise reported to the same commanding officer. Henry was a very patience person who often listen to Cherise as she expressed her concerns; or when she simply wanted to reminisce about family life in the U.S. Henry would sometimes share his upbring with Cherise; but for the most part, he would sit in silence and listen to her talk. His patience provided Cherise the peace of mind and calmness she needed. Henry and Cherise assignment in Afghanistan ended at the same time. Back in North Carolina, the two hardly spent time with each other. It was back to norm as they knew it prior to deployment. They would greet each other in person whenever their paths cross, as well as, like each other postings on Facebook. After six years of service, Cherise decided not to re-enlist. It was time to go home and learn how to navigate in life as a civilian. Two years after returning home, Cherise received a DM from Henry on Facebook. He informed Cherise of his decision to not re-enlist after serving eight years. He told Cherise that two of his siblings moved to the same state where she lives; but he will remain in North Carolina to help his middle brother who is a single father. After the DM, Henry would often call Cherise to talk about the way of life in the city where she lived. He would also ask about the distant between where she lives in California to where his oldest brother lives in California. His brother lives in a different city of the same state as Cherise. Cherise informed Henry that it is approximately a two-hour drive on the weekend without traffic. During the week, the route is known for heavy traffic therefore it would be approximately a four-hour drive. 

    To Cherise surprise, three weeks later, Henry calls her from the airport, on a Thursday afternoon, asking her to pick him up then transport him to his brother’s house. Cherise asked, “which airport are you at?” After hearing Henry’s reply, she asked him, “why would you fly into an airport near my house when your brother lives two hours away from where I live.” Henry response was “my brother is usually tired after work and will not have the energy to pick me up from the airport.” Cherise was upset with Henry’s lack in consideration of her time. She thought to herself as she went to pick up Henry from the airport. What if I did not answer my phone or was not available. What would he had done for transportation to his brother’s house? After picking up Henry, it took them 4 ½ hours in traffic to arrive at Henry’s brother’s home. It took Cherise 2 ½ hours in her return to home. During the ride back home, Cherise made a mental note to tell Henry next time, he needs to fly into an airport closer to his brother home then take the shuttle bus or an Uber to his brother’s house. “Cherise thinks out loud; I can’t believe I have been on the road for 7 hours; I am exhausted.”

    Cherise did not hear from Henry for six months after taking him to his brother’s house. One evening she receives a call; looking at the caller ID, she thinks to herself, Henry better not be calling me for long distance transportation again. “Hello” “Hey baby girl, what’s up?” States Henry after Cherise picks up his call. “Hi Henry, what’s up with you. All is well on my end.” “Well, I’m back in town. This time I’m not at the airport; I’m here at my brother’s house. I have been here for a week. I will be in town for another week before heading back to North Carolina. I was wondering if we can hang out?” “Henry, I do not mind us hanging out; however, I do not want to make that drive back to your brother’s house.” “Do you know of any transportation that can take me from my brother house to yours?” “Why don’t you rent a car? Check online for discount car rentals near you that would allow you to drop off the car at the airport. This way you do not have to arrange for transportation to the airport when you return home.” “Good idea Cherise, I will come over tomorrow around noon.” “Sounds good Henry, see you tomorrow.” Cherise was so glad she did not have to chauffeur Henry around town. The next day Cherise gets up early to prepare her place for company. She decided to order wings from her favorite fast-food restaurant, to go with the pasta salad she made earlier in the day. Her intercom buzzed at 1:15pm. “Hello shouts Cherise through the intercom.” “Hey baby girl, it me Henry, I’m downstairs.” Cherise buzzed him in after telling him her apartment number. To her surprise, he has a little boy with him. Henry greets Cherise with a hug. He was carrying a large army tote bag; like the ones they used in the army as luggage when they travel. She was so taken back by the child with him; she didn’t think to ask why he did not leave his luggage in the car. Cherise turns to the child and says, “Hi my name is Cherise. What is your name?” “My name is Henry Jr; everyone calls me junior.” “How old are you junior? “I am ten.” Henry Sr tells Cherise, he will explain later. After lunch, Cherise allowed junior to play her video games in her bedroom while she talks to his father in the living room. According to Henry Sr, junior mother was a one-night stand before going into the service. He did not know he was a father until he was contacted three months ago from children services. The mother was arrested. She was sentenced to ten years. She had no living family member to take junior. Because Henry wasn’t sure if he was the father, Children services arranged for a paternity test. It came back positive that Henry was the father. Now that Henry is a single father just like his brother in North Carolina; his siblings tell him that he needs to obtain housing for himself and his child rather than go from couch to couch at the homes of family. Henry asked to stay with Cherise for a couple of weeks until he figures things out.

    Cherise lives in a one-bedroom apartment. Because of the child, she allowed Henry and his son junior to sleep on her sectional couch. Henry was putting in grocery orders without compensating her expenses. After two weeks she asked Henry about his plans. He did not have any. She explained to him that she could not continue to take care of him and his son. She told him that he needs to apply for public assistance in his hometown. And he needed to apply for housing assistance for single parents. Henry was unaware that this was something he could do. Cherise, help Henry with the online application for public assistance. Also, she assists him with booking his flight back to North Carolina. Henry brother in North Carolina agreed to allow him and his son stay at his home until the public assistance finds them a low-income place. After Henry and his son leaves, Cherise thinks out loud; I am rethinking if I want to get marry and have kids. I enjoyed their company but am happy they are gone. I am so tired from cleaning up piss from around my toilet as well as picking up their clothes; washing their clothes; cooking every day and being Henry’s personal business assistant. He acted like he did not know how to read and fill-out the public assistant’s application online. Is this how it is being marry? A woman must do everything for the man.

    Cherise felt all must be well with Henry after a year of not hearing from him when suddenly she gets a call. She looks at her caller ID, then shouts; “Damn, I just jink myself. Why did I have to think about that man? What does he want from me now? Cherise tried to push the red button so that the call can go to voicemail when she accidentally pushes the green button. “Oh Shit” shouts Cherise. The word “hello, hello” is being shouted through her phone; she now must reply. “Hello, Cherise replied”. “Hey baby girl. What are you up to?” “Hi Henry, I was getting ready to run out to take care of some business. Can you call me back later?” “Well, I won’t be long. I am in town with my girl and I want to take her around sightseeing. I was wondering if you can take us around to different tourist locations; I have a list. As well as to a couple of nice restaurants while we are in town.” “Sorry Henry, google maps is the best tourist guide I know and is always available. I suggest you get a cellphone charger for the car and allow it to navigate the way. You and your girl have a wonderful time sightseeing. As stated, I was running out to take care of some business. Bye.” After hanging up, Cherise blocked Henry’s phone number.

    https://bookofrelationship.com

  • There is a Thin Line Between Love and Hate

    Why do men have to learn the hard way after pushing the envelope?

    Let’s talk about it…

    Mr. Johnny Red Walker has been married for thirty-five years to his beautiful wife Coral. They married when Johnny Red was twenty-five and Coral was twenty. They have two children, a son, Johnny Red Jr, who is 30 years of age and a daughter, Corine, who is 28 years of age. Everyone calls Johnny Red Jr, J R for short. J R is single. He works as a fitness trainer during the day. Corine is engaged to her 2-year-old daughter’s father. She works as a nurse. Because Mr. Walker did not want his wife to work outside the home when they married, he built a night club from the ground up when he was only 25 shortly after marrying Coral. Mr. Walker continued to work his daytime job as a postal inspector after opening his night club. To this day, at age sixty, Mr. Walker still works his daytime job. Many well-known jazz singers were originally feature and discovered in Mr. Walker’s night club. The club’s hour of operation is 7pm-11pm on Thursdays; 7pm-2am on Fridays; 5pm-2am on Saturdays; and 5pm to 10pm on Sundays. Although the club was only open four days a week, Mr. Walker would go out every evening dressed in a 3-piece suit with shining gator shoes and a Fedora hat. He would tell his wife Coral that he was working. For years, Mr. Walker would come home around 5 am looking fresh and rested. Because Mrs. Walker was known for putting the chain on the door, Mr. Walker would have to knock on the door each time he arrived home at 5 am. Mrs. Walker routinely in her sweet and low voice would ask “Who is it”.  “It’s me baby, Johnny.” Mrs. Walker would open the door and ask her husband “are you hungry? Are you hungry, honey? Did you eat?” Upon Mr. Walker answer NO, she would reply, “let me hang up your coat, pass me your hat” All the while she is smiling, never once rising her voice. Mrs. Walker would fix her husband a cup of coffee as he changes his clothes before heading to his daytime job at the post office.

    The club begin to decline during the start of the rap era. The club no longer feature jazz artists singing live. Occasionally a live band would play but it soon faded as well and was replaced with music from an online playlist streaming over loudspeakers. Because the club was in threat of closure; J R took over as part owner. J R hire an interior decorator to update the décor. His hope is to follow the same concepts for the club as his father. He visions new singers and rappers being able to showcase their skills. He added three VIP areas. For group parties, he added two private rooms with a window view of the stage. J R open the bar area of the club every day at 3pm. Except on Sundays when the club was closed. The drinks were discounted from 3pm to 7pm.The club closed at 2a.m. each day it was open. The club would hire students from the local culinary school to prepare the finger foods listed on their menu. Once again, the club has become a lucrative business for the Walkers.

    Although the club was attracting a younger crowd of people between the ages of 21 to 35, Mr. Walker would dress up in a 3-piece suit, a Fedora hat and shining gator shoes every night. After a month of watching his dad sit at the bar flirting with women, J R pulls his dad aside; “hey dad, I got this. There is no need for you to come to the club every evening because you are part owner. We have enough staff and a floor manager who is doing an outstanding job. It’s time for you to sit back and just enjoy the fruit of the seed you planted.” “I hear you son, but I like to keep myself busy. How about if I come in a couple of nights each week just to see how things are going.” “I think that is a good idea dad.” Mr. Walker made a phone call before heading out the door. A few months went pass when J R suddenly realized he has not seen his dad in the club. He made a mental note to call and check on him; he wanted to make sure that he did not hurt his dad’s feelings.

    A lady wearing a sexy red jump suit ask to speak to the owner or the manager. One of the bottle girls escorts the lady to J R. “J R, someone is asking to speak with you.” The bottle girl introduces J R to the lady as the owner. J R shakes the lady hand, before asking “how can I help you?” “I was sitting at the bar when someone approached me on my right and offer to buy me a drink. I only turn for a moment to thank the person and to let him know I am waiting for someone. As soon as I turn back around, I noticed someone had pick pocket my purse I had on my left shoulder taking my wallet.” “I am so sorry to hear this, I can assure you this is the first incident of theft reported since re-opening the club. Let me escort you to our security covering the cameras. Hopefully the theft is on camera so we can submit a copy of the tape to the police.” J R asked the lady to follow him to the security room where the cameras are located. As they entered the room J R hears one security guard saying to another guard, “the owner’s old man Mr. Walker comes up in here every evening around 6pm then leave with the same lady. They are in and out within 2 minutes. I wonder if boss man know that his dad is meeting some lady at the club every night.” J R walks up behind the two security guards as they were talking. He clears his throat to let them know he was behind them. He says to them both, “we will discuss that later; in the meantime, I need you all to assist this young lady. Someone pick pocket her purse as she was distracted by another guest. Can you check the cameras so that a police report can be filed? If you all spot the pick-pocketer in the club, please obtain him in the back until the police arrive.” “Okay, boss.” J R turns to the lady, “again I am sorry this happen in my club; you are in good hands. Hopefully, we can find out who did this.” As J R walks out the security room, he asked the guards to make sure this young lady receive a complimentary drink card dated for any future date of her choice.”

    As the club was closing for the evening, J R asked the security guard to show him the tape of his father coming into the club each evening and the moment he leaves with the same lady. J R recognize the lady as a friend of the family who use to come to gatherings at their home. She would sometimes bring her son with her who is the same age as J R. J R often wonder why she stop attending events at their home. He like hanging out with her son when they use to visit but had no way of getting in touch with him. J R was trying to remember her name. It finally came to him as he was driving home for the evening. Oh, yeah thought J R to himself, her name is Ms. Pat, and her son’s name is Phillip. I wonder how Phillip is doing. Dad must be helping her with something. That’s strange; why didn’t he say something, I could have been of assistance as well. Plus, it would have been good to hear what Phillip has been up to lately. Man, thought J R, it’s been a minute. I think the last time I saw Ms. Pat and Phillip had to be about twenty years ago when Phillip and I was ten years old.

    The next day J R decided to go over to his parent’s home to find out what is going on with Ms. Pat. “Hey Mom, where is dad?” “Hi J R, your dad is out and about. He never tells me where he is going. I’m sure he will return before it’s time to open the club.” “Mom, how is Ms. Pat and her son Phillip doing?” J R mother had a surprised startled look on her face. “Why are you asking about Ms. Pat and her son?” “I’m just being nosey; trying to find out what is it that you and dad is helping her with.” “What gave you the impression that we are helping her?” “She comes into the club every evening around the same time and leaves with dad.” J R mom Coral stared in space in silence for a moment before speaking. “Well son, I will leave that explanation to your father; apparently he is the one helping her.” J R suddenly realized; he opens a can of worms that his mother knew nothing about. “Sorry mom, I didn’t mean to ignite a fire to something I’m sure is innocent in nature.” “It’s okay son. All is good on my end.” J R left his parents’ home with an uncomfortable feeling. He wasn’t sure if he should talk to his dad about the conversation he had with his mom, or if he should just leave it alone. J R decided to observe his father and Ms. Pat at the club before jumping to any conclusions. That evening he watched from a distance as his father comes into the club, walks up to Ms. Pat; greets her with a hug; takes her by the hand as they walk out the club together grinning from ear to ear. J R concluded; no explanation was needed from his father.

    As usual, Mr. Johnny arrives home at 5am in the morning knocking on the door. Mrs. Walker routinely in her sweet and low voice ask, “Who is it”.  “It’s me baby, Johnny.” Mrs. Walker open the door and ask her husband “are you hungry? Are you hungry, honey? Did you eat?” Upon Mr. Walker answer NO, she replied, “let me hang up your coat, pass me your hat” All the while she is smiling, never once rising her voice. Mrs. Walker fix her husband a cup of coffee as he changed his clothes. It’s 5 o’clock in the morning; Mr. Walker did not give it a single thought until the sweetest woman in the world became the meanest woman in the world. He made her that way. Now that he is laid up in the hospital, bandage from feet to head, he has a message for his son when he arrives at the hospital. “Son, here I am in the hospital, bandage from feet to head; in a state of shock because I’m an inch from being dead. I didn’t think your mama would do something like this to me; I didn’t think she had the nerve; but here I am, I guess actions speak louder than word. It is a thin line between love and hate. “Dad, lesson learned. Replied    J R.”

    https://bookofrelationship.com

  • I do not want to be a Player no more

    How do one switch from a player to a family man?

    Let’s talk about it…

    “Hey Big Red, what’s going on? I hear your boy Reggie is throwing another party on the yacht this coming Mother’s Day. He is calling it ladies’ night. The flyer isn’t as detail as normal. It did not list the cost at the door. Do you know if the lady’s cost is discounted or free, asked Debbie?” “Hey Debbie, you are out shopping late. I thought only the guys goes to the grocery store late at night to avoid the crowd of women during the day unless they are on the prowl. So, tell me, which is it for you? Why are you shopping this late?” “I just got off work from my occasionally part-time bartending job. So back to my question about Reggie’s party.” “Oh yeah, I saw a copy of the flyer; however, I haven’t spoken to Reggie since reviewing it. Normally, he would discuss the event with me before posting the flyer on social media. So, I’m not sure if he wants me to work with him for this event. I will send you a text as soon as I have more details than what is stated on the flyer.” “Okay, thanks Big Red.” As Debbie turns to walk away, Big Red shouts out. “Hey Deb, are you still working your daytime job as an Accountant?” “Yes, I am still working as an Accountant. My brother owns a restaurant; I sometimes fill in as a bartender when he is short of staff.” “I hear you, shouts Big Red. I might need to hire you to help me with balancing my books. We can talk about it later. Take care.” Debbie heads to the register as Big Red continued to shop.

    Two days later, Debbie noticed a revised flyer was posted. The new flyer was more detailed. In honors of Mother’s Day, the cost at the door is $5 for women only. The men had to pay the regularly door cost of $20. The cost of drinks was not discounted. After reviewing the new flyer Debbie call her girls to see if they were going to the event. Debbie and her three friends were all single and normally go to party events together. Two of her friends dated Reggie at the same time but did not know it because Reggie convinces them both to keep their relationship with him private. He gave them some lame excuse that they both believed. Even though their gut was telling them Reggie reason for keeping it a secret was questionable; they did as he requested because they both did not want to lose what they perceived as a good thing. Debbie’s friend Cindy was so in love with Reggie; she wanted to shout it to the world. Cindy did not understand why Reggie would not allow her to at least tell her best friends or her family. She understood it’s a possibility Reggie image as an entertainer made a lot of money, especially from women, if he showcases himself as a single man. However, she knows of many male entertainers who is publicly in a relationship; yet they are very popular among women. The women still come out to these entertainers shows and shout out their names knowing they are in a relationship. Cindy was so in love she wanted to burst with expressing her love to others for her man. After two years of dating Reggie in private, she decided to tell her girls and asked them to keep it secret. Cindy decided to invite the girls over for a game of spade. Each of the girls would take turns hosting a night of spade at their house on the weekends. Sometimes they would team up in hosting. The host was responsible for drinks and finger foods. This was the lady’s way of keeping their bound strong regardless of what was going in life. After a couple of games and drinks, Cindy was ready to share her good news. “Ladies, before we begin the third game, I have something I would like to talk with you all about. I have been secretly dating someone we all know. Before you all question my loyalty to you as my friends, I was torn between violating the trust of my man by telling what he asked me to keep private with good reasons. Yet at the same time, I realized I am violating the trust of my friendship with you all. I have peace within myself, to understand by telling you all my secret, it will remain a secret until my man, and I decide together to go public.” “Ok girl, shouts Gabby, spill it. What is your secret?” Without further delay, Cindy states, “Reginald and I have been dating for two years.” “What the F, shouts Bunny. Are you talking about Reggie the entertainer and promoter? The person who yachts parties we attend?” “Yes, states Cindy. Why do you sound so upset?” “I am more than upset; I am mortified. Reggie and I have been dating for three years. Did he give you the same lame excuse he gave to me; by saying it will hurt his career if he goes publicly to declare he has a girl friend?” “Yes, that’s exactly what he said to me, states Cindy. I am so sorry Bunny; I would never do anything intentionally or directly to hurt you. I had no idea you were dating him as well. I am so sorry.” “It’s okay Cindy, I am not mad at you. He lied to us both.”

    Gabby holds her head down as she raised her hand to share what she knows about Reggie. The ladies turn towards Gabby afraid to speak. “Debbie breaks the ice by saying, don’t’ tell me he is dating you too Gabby.” “No, he is not dating me, but he is engaged to my co-worker. My co-worker confided in me three months ago because she wants me to be in her wedding. She told me to keep it a secret until they go public before the wedding.” “You ladies can no longer hold this man secrets states Debbie. No telling how many more women is dating Reggie and holding his secret.” “What do we do? Asked Bunny.” “Tell it publicly with proof of pictures states Debbie.” The ladies spend the rest of the evening posting pictures of Reggie with Cindy and Reggie with Bunny, as well as love quotes from Reggie to Cindy and love quotes from Reggie to Bunny. Two weeks after posting the pictures, Gabby reported to the ladies that her co-worker end her engagement to Reggie. Gabby expressed how sad she feels for all the ladies hurt by this man. She states that her co-worker put in for two weeks of personal time to deal with the trauma this womanizer caused her. A week before the Mother’s Day party event on the yacht. A flyer was posted on social media stating the event has been canceled until further noticed. Debbie calls Big Red to see if she can get some information from him because Reggie refused to take Cindy and Bunny calls after learning they were the ones who initiated the flood of woman that came forth after seeing the pictures those two posted on social media. Big Red looks at his caller ID to see Debbie was calling. He picks up his phone. “Hey Deb, what’s up girl?” “Hi Big Red, how are you doing? I hope all is well?” “All is well, so what’s up?” “Well, I know you work with Reggie and I was wondering why the Mother’s Day event has been canceled. I was looking forward to going.” “I am sure you know about the woman putting Reggie on blast via the social media. You should know about it; I see two of your friends is among the many women who has post pictures putting him on blast.” “Yes, I have heard about it. I don’t talk to my girls about it because it is a sore sensitive area for them.” “I understand, states Big Red. Anyway, Reggie is taking time away from the public to self-reflect and to get back to his roots; his spiritual roots. From what I hear, he is out the country at a spiritual retreat for men. Hurting the love of his life, who he was engaged to marry soon; has been devasting for him. I know that sounds strange because he is the one who caused the hurt. But what women do not understand is that sometimes men do not know why they are a womanizer. It’s like an addiction that they cannot control because they do not understand how, why and when it begin. The best way I can explain it to a woman is by relating it to a diet. Women are always dieting. You women go up and down in weight which cause you to always be on a diet. One would think that if you once master how to lose weight that you would take what you learned and use it for life to maintain your idea weight. Maybe this would be easy if you do not need food to sustain life; but you do. Therefore, the thing that sustain life also can take your life if you do not learn how to find a healthy balance. Reggie is learning how to find a healthy balance by being in a relationship with one woman and only one woman.” “Thank you for that break down Big Red. This changed my perception of Reggie. I will pray for him as well as for the woman he has hurt. All of them need to heal so that they do not pass that hurt they are feeling on to the next person they become involved with.” Amen, declared Reggie. Have a good evening, Deb.” “You as well.” The two hangs up.

    At the retreat, after three days of fasting, Reggie enters a cave they call the holy of holies. This cave is where the men go to pray and spend intimate time with God in mediation. Reggie is dressed in white linen and is bare footed. He kneels on a huge soft pillow as he spends time in the presence of God. Dear God, it’s me, your son Reginald. I know it has been a while since I engaged in conversation with you. You, being an all-knowing God, knows that you are always in my thoughts. It is for this reason; my actions always caused me to feel guilty; to rid myself of the guilt so that I could live the life I was living without remorse; I separated myself from you by hiding. I know it was foolish of me to think I could hide from you. Especially when I felt your presence each day. Your love was always with me. It is your love that is drawing me back to you this very moment. Heavenly Father, in view of your mercy I am offering my body as a living sacrifice by using the strength and power of your holy spirit to live a life that is pleasing to you. I now understand, the peace I am so desperately searching for is in pleasing you. I no longer want to conform to the pattern of this world, the pattern of my toxic living. I have opened my heart and spirit to be transformed by the renewing of my mind. Also, I now understand this doesn’t mean I cannot have fun in life; but it means I will no longer intentionally hurt people to satisfy my personal lust. Father God, in your son Jesus Christ name, allow people to one day see the new me and act according to what they see in me now and not on what they knew of me in the past. I understand this will take time for people to trust me and possibly see the new me. No matter the length of the course, I will remain steadfast in the new me without compromise. God, I thank you for being a God of second and third chances. However, many chances it took for me to get it right, I thank you for those chances. In Jesus name I pray. Amen!

    https://bookofrelationship.com

  • I heard it through the grapevine

    I heard it through the grapevine that my stalker is a good person who secretly admirers me. How was I supposed to know?

    Let’s talk about it…

    Sophia has been divorced for two years. She separated from her abusive husband after five years of marriage. Her husband gave her an option in the divorce decree that she could not turn down. He offers to give her full custody of their four-year-old son in exchange to him keeping their family house as well as him not having to pay child support or alimony.  Sophia did not care about waving her rights to child support and alimony, she wanted out of the toxic marriage. Sophia was happy that she stashed a little cash before separating from her husband. It helped her and Jeffrey Jr. to get on their feet after being kicked out the family home. Sophia found a job working in Customer Service. Her and Jeffrey Jr. found a really nice one-bedroom apartment. The bedroom was large enough for a queen bed, a twin bed, a dresser and two-night stands. After the divorce, Sophia struggle financially. She always paid her rent and utilities first; However, she would struggle with paying child care, buying food, and clothing for her growing son. For the first year and a half of working, Sophia only purchased sale items at the grocery store and shopped at thrift stores for clothing. She was an outstanding worker. She was liked by her co-workers and highly favor by the Customer Service department upper management team. After nearly 2 years of working, Sophia received a promotion. The promotion helped to ease her financial burden. Not having to worry about her finances help Sophia to become more sociable with her co-workers. She started attending functions at their homes as well as occasional happy hour socializing after work. Sophia bubbly personality and compassionate spirit drew people to her. People felt safe sharing personal information in her presence.

    Men would approach Sophia often to ask for her phone number or to ask her out on a date. Although it has been three years since her divorce, Sophia was still feeling traumatized by her ex-husband abusive behavior. She wasn’t looking to enter back into another romantic relationship anytime soon. Sophia’s co-workers knew she had a bad break-up from her ex-husband but they did not know the integral details of the relationship. Whenever one of Sophia’s co-workers would try to play match maker, she would express to them that she was not ready for any intimate relationship. They respected her decision. Shortly after Sophia co-workers stop playing match maker, she starts receiving gifts on her desk at work from a secret admirer. The gifts were small and appeared to be innocent in nature. She would receive inspirational music CD’s, gift cards, birthday cards, toys for her son, notes type on fancy paper on how much her gentle spirit and beautiful personality is admired. Whenever Sophia would inquire about the gifts from her co-workers, no one knew who was putting the gifts on her desk. Sophia felt uncomfortable receiving gifts from an unknown person at her job. She talked to co-workers about having management place a camera around her desk but did not want to get the person in trouble or fire when the gifts appeared to be innocent in nature. After expressing her concerns to co-workers, the secret admirer stopped putting gifts on her desk.

    After three months of no gifts, Sophia thought it was over when one day, upon arriving home from work she finds a gift box at her door. She lived in a triplex apartment building. She thought to herself, this had to be placed at my door by mistake. When she looked at the gift card attached to the box; it read “To Sophia from secret admirer”. Sophia became frighten because now this person knows where she lives. Sophia made sure her door was securely locked behind her. She wasn’t to concern about her windows because she lived on the second floor. She begins to wonder if this person was a threat. Would this person try to hurt her and her son? Sophia pulls a typed note out the box. The secret admirer had to know the gift box placed at her door would frighten her; because the note tells Sophia not to be frighten or to worry about any harm coming to her and her son. The admirer expressed his love for her gentleness and her poise. He expressed that he was very shy and had heard from her co-workers that she was not ready for an intimate friendship. He expressed that he just wanted to be her friend. He did not want to come to her home; just talk to her over the phone until she was comfortable with them hanging out. Sophia thought to herself; my co-workers have to know who is this person. He is referencing my co-workers too much in this note. She further thinks to herself; how do I find out which one of my co-workers know who is this person.

    One day Sophia goes to the warehouse to speak with the Supervisor who was not answering his phone. She had a hot replacement shipment that did not have a Return Material Authorization attached to it. After she finish talking to the Supervisor about the shipment, he made a statement about liking the same musical group she likes. Sophia asked him how do you know I like that musical group. The Supervisor states, the musical group CD was playing in the warehouse when I overheard your co-worker Cynthia telling a couple of my workers that you are also a fan of the musical group. The Supervisor could not recall which of his workers Cynthia was talking to about the CD. After returning to her desk, Sophia asked Cynthia if she could call her after work. Sophia gave Cynthia an approximate time she would be home and available to talk. As agreed, Cynthia calls exactly at the hour given by Sophia. “Good evening, Cynthia, I see you are equally on time in your personal life as in your professional life. My phone rang exactly at 7:00pm.” “Well, you sounded very complexed at work when you asked me to call you. What’s on your mind; states Cynthia, besides I try to value people time by being on time.” Earlier today at work, I had a conversation with the Supervisor of the warehouse. He made a statement about overhearing you talk with two of his workers about me liking a musical group whose CD their were listening to.” “Oh yeah, shouts Cynthia, I remember that conversation. John and Nathaniel were the two workers I mention that to. Did I do something wrong?” “No, you did nothing wrong. I only asked because the person who call themselves my Secret Admirer gave me a copy of that particular CD.” “Oh, I see where you are heading with this, it’s possible that John or Nathaniel is the Secret Admirer or know who is the Secret Admirer.” “That’s it exactly Cynthia.” “Well Sophia, based on their relationship status, it’s possible your Secret Admirer could be John; he is single. Nathaniel is married; however, I did hear that him and his wife is having problems. Because of his marital status, it would make sense why he would be your Secret Admirer. John would not have a need to be secret.” “I appreciate your help, Cynthia. Have a good evening. I will see you tomorrow at work.” “Okay Sophia, you as well.” The next day at work, the grapevine begins to talk. It was obvious to Sophia that Cynthia had discussed their conversation with other co-workers. These co-workers shared with Sophia that they think Nathaniel likes her because he always asks how she is doing. After work, Sophia runs into Nathaniel in the parking lot. “Hi Nathaniel, I did not know you drive a King Cab Pickup Truck.” “Yeah, this is my man toy. Do you need to use the service of my truck? My mom doesn’t live that far from where you live?” “Oh, you know where I live?” Nathaniel giggle as he stated, “well I was going to my mother’s house one day after work when I noticed you were driving in front of me. I couldn’t help but to see where you live.” “Oh, I see states Sophia.” At that moment Nathaniel knew he put his foot in his mouth. “Sophia, I have a confession. Can we go to a local café to talk? I do not want to talk in front of the job; our co-workers love to gossip.” Sophia agreed to meet Nathaniel at a coffee and donut shop ten miles away from the job.

    Nathaniel was the perfect gentleman at the coffee shop. He opens the door for Sophia and pull out her chair to sit before he sat. He ordered and pay for them both a cup of coffee. He starts the conversation by saying, “please let me apologize if I frighten you with all the anonymous gifts. It was not my intend. Sometimes us men don’t think with wisdom when it comes to courting a lady.” “So, is that what you were doing?” Yes, it is. I like you a lot. There is something about you that I cannot put into words. You make my heart flutter every time I see you or think about you.” “Nathaniel, I heard through the grapevine that you are marry. Is this true?” “Yes, I am; however, my wife and I am going through a separation. I am looking for a studio apartment. Currently, I sleep on a roll-away bed in the den of our home.” “Nathaniel, you have to understand, you might have called yourself a Secret Admirer who was trying to court a person you like a lot; however, my perception was totally different. To me, you were a Stalker and I was very concerned for my safety. I would love to get to know the real you, but it will take some time. I have to transition my thoughts from Stalker to Secret Admirer. I’m sure you are a good person otherwise I won’t be here at this coffee shop with you. Please allow me the time to learn more about who you are as a person. We can keep in contact by phone and can occasionally meet at this coffee shop to talk in person. I have a young son, therefore; I don’t feel comfortable with you coming to my home until you have the green light from me. The light was red, now it’s yellow.” “I understand Sophia. I’m happy you are open to getting to know me better. Nathaniel walked Sophia to her car; he asked permission to hug her after opening her car door. Permission was given. They both drove away with a smile on their face.

    https://bookofrelationship.com

  • Stop in the name of love, before you break my heart

    It’s time to exit from this open relationship before my heart gets broken.

    Let’s talk about it…

    Paul and Martha have been in an exclusive relationship for five years. They both are in their mid-thirties. They met at a millionaire dating event put together by Paul and his business partners. Paul is a member of a millionaire entrepreneur club. The name of the club is “Reaching for The Sky Millionaire Club”. The club consist of five guys who are friends and millionaires. They pool together a percentage of their income to invest in new joint adventures. The members of the club purchase together, two high rise condominium buildings; one night club and bar; a golf course and club; and the millionaire dating club. The purpose in starting the millionaire social dating club was to bring people of the same financial status together in a safe environment. Paul and his four-business partner had trouble finding women to date that was in the same financial status as themselves. The club host millionaire parties one a month. Only club members are allowed to attend the monthly gala. Each member must pay a yearly membership fee in the amount of $200,000. The fee covers the expenses of the monthly gala. Paul was mesmerized by Martha beauty and poise when she walked into their first millionaire club party. She walked with confident; yet she was very dainty and poised. One could tell her confident was not arrogance. That night at the gala, Paul introduces himself to Martha as one of the club owners. They begin to talk. They both realized they have a lot in common. Before the evening was over, they exchanged contact information. They were dating each other for six months when Paul asked for the relationship to change from casual to exclusive. Martha asked Paul his reason for wanting to be exclusive. Paul expressed how he notices the attention she gets from other guys when she attends the millionaire monthly galas. He didn’t want anyone else to snatch her away from him. Martha agrees to change their dating arrangements. Once Martha and Paul became exclusive, she stops attending the monthly galas. Paul continued to attend as one of the owners. Martha did not understand why Paul had to attend as an owner. She felt staff was more than capable of making sure all went well at the parties. Nonetheless, she wasn’t going to tell Paul how to handle his business. Three years after exclusively dating Paul, Martha noticed a change in him. They would talk less on the phone; go out together to dinner and other social gatherings less; and he stopped spending the night at her home. He was treating her like a one-night stand each time they came together. After years of Paul’s change in behavior, Martha decided their relationship was not worthy of the status exclusive. She asked Paul for an open relationship. Paul was opposed to an open relationship but have no other choice when Martha presented receipts showing that she had proof that he was dating other women from the millionaire social club. She was tired of sitting home alone with limited contact to Paul while he was out enjoying himself. Paul agreed to the open relationship under one circumstance; that she does not rejoin the millionaire club to find dates. Martha agreed.

    Paul thought by preventing Martha from becoming an active club member would limit her from finding anyone to date. Martha found a new website called “The Millionaire Socialites.” To join the site, a person would have to create a profile as well as pay a monthly membership fee of $300. To Martha surprise, as a new site, the millionaire dating website had many members. Martha was intrigued by three individuals on the site. They all were handsome, single, with no kids. The first person she met and started dating is Jesse. Jesse is a very adventurous person. He loves to sky dive; sail; take hot air balloons rides; and hike. William is the second person she met and is also dating. William loves theatrical outings. He and Martha would fly all over the country to attend concerts, plays and musicals.  Glen is the third person she met and is also dating. Glen loves walking alongside the shore at the beach and planning romantic picnics. Also, he loves indoor rock climbing, bike riding, skating and going to the gym with his date. Martha felt when you put all four of the men she was dating together, she had the perfect man. Of course, Paul has priority over the other three. Nevertheless, she never had any scheduling problems. Her life appeared to be purposeful and fulfilled. She was living her best life. She never had to sit home waiting for Paul to have time for her again. She never wonders about who he was dating or what he was doing. Martha did not care about what people thought about her living her life out loud in the same manner as men. Martha thought to herself, if a man can do it, so can I. I do not believe in this double standard Mombo Jumbo bull kraft.

    Because Martha was always readily available for Paul, he did not know that she was dating three other guys. This caused him to become very arrogant in his disposition toward her. One of the things Martha had always loved about Paul is his confidence was without arrogance. This is what drew them together as kindred spirits. Suddenly, Martha notices Paul was feeling himself by thinking he had the upper hand in their relationship because he had access to many women who were members of his millionaire social club. Also, because he didn’t see any signs of Martha dating anyone other than him. Paul became so arrogant, he begins to shove his dating relationships in Martha’s face by telling her, I can’t come over tonight as planned, because Janice needs more of my time. I will be spending the evening with her. Barbara and I will be out of town for three days on a weekend cruise. I will celebrate your birthday with you next month after I return from Jamaica with Susie. Martha would smile without comments to Paul arrogant statements. She realized, why am I making Paul a priority in our open relationship when he isn’t making me a priority. She thought to herself, as of today this will end; I will fit him in according to my schedule. I know I am the one who suggest the open relationship; however, it was only because he was secretly dating other women; so, I figure why not join him by dating other men.

    Paul calls Martha after he returned from his Jamaica trip. Rather than ask her how she was doing, he immediately started to talk about the awesome time he had in Jamaica. He was telling her about the trip like her and Susie was best of friends. Martha patiently listens to him talk without interrupting his flow. When he finishes bragging, he tells Martha, I cleared Saturday so we can spend the day celebrating your birthday. Paul was taken back by Martha’s comment. “Paul honey, states Martha, why don’t you give me a call on Sunday with the details of how much fun you had celebrating my birthday. Maybe Janice or Barbara is available to celebrate with you. Susie might be to tire after the Jamaica trip. I have plans on Saturday. As a matter of fact, the only dates I have available is a Thursday evening three weeks from today and a Saturday one month from this coming Saturday. Let me know if any of these dates are good for you. Maybe we can go see a movie or go to our favorite restaurant together.” “What do you have plan, in place of celebrating your birthday with me, asked Paul.” “Saturday morning, Jesse and I will be sailing on his boat. We will have lunch on the Marina and spend Saturday evening taking a helicopter ride to dinner on his friends private Island.” “Who the hell is Jesse?” “Someone I am dating, states Martha.” “Does Jesse know you are in an open relationship?” “Yes, he does and so do William and Glen.” “What the F. How many men are you dating?” “You make four”. “Why didn’t you tell me you were dating three men besides me?” “Paul, I might have been the first to verbally request an open relationship; but it was only after finding out you had been secretly dating other women for two years while we were in an exclusive relationship. When you agreed to the open relationship, you were the one who set the rules. Not one time did you state I have to report to you who I was dating. All though I am dating three other men, I always made you priority until I realized that I was not priority in your life. I decided to follow your lead in this open relationship. So, you tell me what is it that you want to do. I refuse to be in another one-sided open relationship with you. Whereas you are the only one dating other people while I sit home waiting for you to have time for me. I am not that girl. I have too much confidence in myself and self-love. I am not close minded to trying new things; for this reason and because of my love for you, is the only reason why I requested an open relationship. Otherwise, I would have simply ended our relationship once I found out you were dating other women while we were dating exclusively. Talk to me. What do you want to do?” “Let me think about it. I will call you tomorrow, state Paul.” Both hangs up the phone.

    The next day Paul calls Martha. “Hello Martha, I gave our conversation on yesterday a lot of thought. I need for us to stop in the name of love. It’s time to exit from this open relationship before my heart gets broken. I am willing to go back to us dating exclusively. I promise you; it will not be one-sided. If you agree to us dating exclusively, I will immediately end my relationship with the other women. I am here to commit to you and only you. My actions will align with my words. I will be more present in this relationship. Will you give us another try?” “Yes, Paul; I would love to give our relationship another try. I am open to us only dating exclusively. I will also end my relationship with the other men immediately.” “Can I come over tonight? States Paul. I need to see you; kiss you and hold you in my arms. I love you, Martha.” “I love you too Paul.”

    https://bookofrelationship.com

  • Cruising Together

    Baby let’s cruise away from here; together, forever. This is not a one-night stand.

    Let’s talk about it…

    Barbara Jean is a 29-year-old divorce woman with no kids. She married her high school sweetheart when she was 21 and he was 22. Their marriage last only three years. In high school, Barbara Jean and Windell were best friends. They were known among their friends as the couple that would last a lifetime together. Windell’s parents bought him a car for his 16th birthday. Barbara Jean worked part time during high school. She would spend her entire check on the latest fashion. Her and Windell were always dress to a Tee. Because of their fashion and Windell’s car, they were very popular among their peers in high school. Windell reason for divorcing Barbara Jean is simply because he felt they married too soon after leaving their parents’ home. He felt they didn’t have any time apart to explore life as single individuals. According to Windell, he rather divorces Barbara Jean than cheat on her. Barbara Jean knew otherwise; she knew Windell was cheating on her a year after they got marry. He was cheating with big booty Judy from high school. Judy didn’t have a curvy shape in high school. She was slim and awkward looking. After having twins by Tyrone shortly after graduating from high school, her figure became curvier. Her boobs blow up like balloons. So did Windell’s head when he saw Judy. Tyrone and Judy broke up after he found out she was pregnant. Tyrone told his boys in the hood that he wasn’t ready to be a father.

    When Barbara Jean suspect Windell was cheating with big booty Judy, she joined the gym to lift her booty. She had her breast enlarged but nothing seems to work. Windell would say her breast was too hard causing them to not feel nature. She tried to get pregnant to see if having a baby would naturally enhance her body the same way it enhanced Judy’s body. Barbara Jean became depressed after Windell divorce her. She would only go out the house for work or to grocery shop. Barbara Jean’s friends were very concern about her. She was always the life of the party. Now she doesn’t care about her appearance or her attire. Barbara Jean three closet friends, Cindy, Babe-Babe, and June came together to do an intervention; hoping that it would help her find a way back to the joy she once displayed each time she was presence among her friends. Because Cindy lives the closet to Barbara Jean, she decided to host the intervention at her house. Babe-Babe was responsible for catering the food. June was responsible for the drinks, and Cindy was responsible for decoration. Cindy decorated her huge backyard with different pictures of Barbara Jean from high school. The pictures were enlarged and placed on five feet Easels. Also, large balloon arrangements of the school colors royal blue and gold were place throughout the backyard. Many of Barbara Jean’s friends were given an invitation with a plus one. They were informed the purpose of the intervention party and therefore was told to not invite Wendell or bring him as their plus one. Babe-Babe is a member of a motorcycle club; she invited all her club members. Three hours before the party, Cindy leaves Babe-Babe and June at her house to welcome the guest as they arrived while she goes to Barbara Jeans’ house unannounced. She rang the doorbell for approximately 15 minutes. Cindy felt Barbara Jean was watching her ring the doorbell through the Ring doorbell camera. She also knew Barbara Jean could her saying “open the door” through the mic on the camera. Barbara Jean was so angry at Cindy for ringing her doorbell now stop; she storms down her stairs to the door. She was prepared to curse Cindy out. When she opens the door, Cindy pushes her way inside. “Okay shouts Cindy, let me have it. Go ahead and curse me out. Get it all out your system. I am not leaving here tonight without you with me.” “What the hell are you talking about Cindy, shouts Barbara Jean. Why are you here unannounced; ringing my doorbell like a mad woman?” “I am here because I love you. I refuse to allow you to give up on life because of the asshole that broke your heart. Why should you punish yourself for doing nothing wrong? Look me in the eyes and tell me to my face that you deserve to spend the rest of your life in sorrow because you love someone who was not faithful to you. Especially when the asshole is out there enjoying his life. Trust and believe me when I say, the hurt he gave will return to him one day. I am not here to focus on what that asshole did to you. I am here to declare that you are loved by so many other people. And these people miss you very much and wants to see you happy. I am going upstairs to run you some bath water and to pick out one of your sexy outfits to wear to my house tonight. I refuse to hear the word NO out of your mouth. You are going with me to my house to have some fun. Period!”

    Barbara Jean begins to cry. At that moment, she realized she had friends who truly loves her. She did not argue with Cindy. She allowed Cindy to run her bath and pick out an outfit. Cindy did her friend makeup and hair. When she finished, they were ready for the five-minute ride to her house. Cindy text Babe-Babe and June letting them know that they were on their way and would arrive in five minutes. To Barbara Jean’s surprised there were two hundred people waiting for her to arrive in Cindy’s backyard. People begin to greet her with a hug as they whisper in her ear; I love you, Barbara Jean. Barbara Jean’s heart had open once again with the outpouring of love she received that evening. Everyone was enjoying themselves dancing, eating and drinking. One of Babe-Babe club members name Dave approached Barbara Jean. He introduces himself. He tells Barbara Jean, before you form a preconceived notion as to who I am because of the leather biker gear I am wearing; let me tell you a little about myself.  I am thirty-five. I am an attorney. I have my own law firm with three other attorneys working for me. I am single and at times very busy when I am working on a case. I do not have kids. I was instantly attracted to you on sight and would love to take you to dinner sometimes. If this is okay with you, I would love to get your phone number. If you need time to think about what I am asking of you; by all means, please take your time. I am not here to rush you into anything that feels uncomfortable to you. Please take my business card and call me at your leisure, when you are ready. Barbara Jean was frightened of the feeling that was flowing through her body as Dave talked to her. She wasn’t sure if she was ready to feel that type of feeling again. She took his card; then thank him for approaching her in a compassionate way. It made her feel safe. She informed Dave that she would give his request some consideration. After the party was over, Barbara Jean thanks her three close girlfriends for rescuing her from herself destruction. She told them about Dave.

    Babe-Babe confirmed all that Dave had told Barbara Jean about himself. A month after the party, Barbara Jean realized that she was going out the house more. Talking with her friends over the phone and on a couple of occasions, she went to have a drink at the bar with Cindy. She couldn’t believe that she was almost back to her normal self. She also notices, she did not think any more about the asshole that divorce her. She was ready to move on by living her life out loud again. Barbara Jean decided to give Dave a call at 6pm on a Friday. Dave was preparing to leave work when he receives Barbara Jean’s call. Her name came up on his caller ID. “Well, hello beautiful,” states Dave after picking up the call. “Is this how you greet all your callers, joked Barbara Jean.” “You are the only one who would get this type of greeting from me.” Barbara Jean begins to giggle. “I hope you are calling to tell me that you will have dinner with me tonight.” “I would love to state Barbara Jean with a smile on her face. Dave asked can he pick her up or if she would feel safer meeting him at the restaurant. Barbara Jean felt safe with Dave. She gave him her address. Dave arrived at Barbara Jeans house at 7:30pm that evening. He took her to an Argentina Fresh Grill Restaurant. They sat for over two hours at the restaurant talking and sipping on wine as they ate their grilled steak and vegetables. Dave and Barbara Jean spent every weekend together after their first date. Dave was very patient with Barbara Jean. She had informed him on their first date that she was emotionally wounded and still in recovery. After six months of dating, Barbara Jean invited Dave to have dinner at her home. She prepared a romantic candlelight dinner. Together they drank two bottles of wine. Barbara Jean did not want Dave to drive home after consuming the bulk of the wine. That evening they became intimated for the first time. Because Dave did not want Barbara Jean to have any regrets, he reassured her that he wanted her to cruise with him forever. He tells her, “Baby, this is not a one-night stand, I want you to cruise with me forever. Don’t be confused because the way is clear. If you want it; you got it forever; just let me love, you. That night was ecstasy for both.

    Two years after dating Barbara Jean, Dave asked for her hand in marriage. Three kids later, Dave and Barbara Jean are still cruising together.

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    https://bookofrelationship.com

  • Ladies First

    What happen to male chivalry? Did it end with generation X?

    Let’s talk about it…

    Curtis and his wife Gloria are having their first child. Curtis is excited to find out the baby’s gender. If it’s a boy, he vowed to pass on the Jordans’ family legacy of chivalry to the male offspring. However, if it’s a girl, he vowed to start a new family legacy by teaching his daughter what not to accept from a man. Curtis’ father Curt taught him the history of their family legacy when he was thirteen. On Curtis’ thirteenth birthday, his father took him camping. For three days, young Curtis learned how to fish; hunt for food; build a campfire; listen for sounds and signs of near danger from wild animals or nature. He learned how to protect himself as well as protect anyone in his care by using nature and items found in the woods to build a weapon or shield. Curtis was taught how to use different types of hunting knives. On the last night of camping, young Curtis was taught the most valuable lesson of chivalry which is how to treat a lady. Curtsays to his son Curtis; “Son, this final lesson starts by hearing then by observation; follow with actions. A woman is the mother of the earth in humanity form, through her loin’s life is reproduce. She is wise, strong; yet soft.  A man should never damage or abuse a “Woman”. Because a woman is a nurturer by nature, she will provide nourishment to a man’s body with food and to his soul with spiritual encouragements. A woman is a man’s lucrative investment. What a man gives in relationship to a woman, he will reap 100 times 100 percent in return. What I am saying son, if a man gives respect to his woman, he will reap respect, dedication and loyalty from his woman. However, if a man damages his woman by hurting her mentally or physically, he will reap sorrow, misfortune and pain in his life. Also, his off springs birth through her loins will not respect him. Son, a man should protect his woman and off springs as well as provide for them. This is not saying that a woman should not work outside the home; but a man’s first financial priority should always be his family’s well-being. A man should open doors for a woman; pull out her chair in restaurants before she sits; carry heavy items for her; make sure the maintenance of her car is up to date. What I have taught you this weekend was taught to my father from his father. This tradition of legacy started with your great-grandfather. It is my sincere desire that you also past down this tradition to your son someday.”

    Curtis, thinks out loud to himself as he prepares to take his wife to the doctor to find out the baby’s gender; I will teach my son the same principles about male chivalry that my father taught to me. Curtis looks up toward the sky as he says “Dad, I won’t let you down. God, please give me the gift of a son with this pregnancy.” Curtis and his wife Gloria are sitting patiently reading magazines as they wait for the nurse to call their names. Curtis’ heart being to jump as he hears the nurse shouts “Gloria Jordan”. Curtis stand up and reach out his hand to help his wife up from her seat. He escorts her towards the open door where the nurse is standing holding their chart in her hands. Good morning, this is my wife Gloria Jordan states Curtis as they approached the nurse. “Good morning Mr. and Mrs. Jordan, please follow me to room five; states the nurse.” Curtis follows behind his wife and the nurse towards room five. After the nurse prepares Gloria for an Ultrasound, she informed them both that the doctor would be in shortly.

    Doctor Gordon greets the couple as he walks into the room. After he examine Mrs. Jordan, he informs them that all appears to be well. However, he informs them that there are two hearts beating systematically or one heart beating irregularly.  The ultrasound will give us clarity states Dr. Gordon. The nurse turns on the ultrasound machine as Dr. Gordon pour gel on Gloria’s belly then proceeded to roll the camera on top of the gel. A picture appeared on the screen of the ultrasound machine. Dr. Gordon looks at the couple with a smile before stating; You are pregnant with twins. Let’s see if we can find out the gender of your babies. One is a boy and the other child is a girl. Curtis jumped with joy. Thank you, Jesus, shouts Curtis. Tears run down Gloria face as she looks at the screen on the machine. The Jordan’s name their twins after Curtis’ mother Brandy and Gloria’s father Brandon.

    Watching their twins grow into their teens; the Jordans felt extremely happy Brandon is not socially shy like his sister Brandy. However, they are concern about his willingness to follow the path of other boys his age. One month before Brandon’s thirteen birthday, Curtis informed him of their plans to go camping for three days. Brandon asked his dad why we need to go camping because I am turning thirteen. Well son, it’s a family tradition past down from your great-great grandfather. The purpose of the camping trip is to teach you the Jordan’s family legacy of chivalry. I will pass on to you what my father taught me about being a man and how to provide and protect your family, as well as, how to treat a woman. Aw dad, that sounds whack. If I must go, can my friends come so we can go swimming and sleep in tents? Son, I have plans to teach you how to fish; hunt for food; build a campfire; listen for sounds and signs of near danger from wild animals or nature and how to protect yourself as well as protect anyone in your care by using nature and items found in the woods to build a weapon or shield. Also, you should learn how to treat and respect a woman. Dad, I am good on how to treat a woman. I always say thank you to mom after she cook for me; clean my room and wash my clothes. I see how happy it makes her when I say thank you. When I get marry, I know to say thank you after my wife do everything for me. What more is there to learn. I don’t think I need a camping trip to learn to say thank you. I know I do not need to go to the woods to learn how to protect myself in the woods because I won’t be going to the woods ever in my life. Dad, I think you should have some fun in life. You might enjoy going camping more if you have some fun. Maybe you need me and my friends to teach you how to have fun.

    Curtis was not prepared for his son’s reaction to taking him camping in honor of the Jordan’s family tradition. He thought Brandon would be as eager as he was at the age of thirteen. “Son, chivalry is so much more than saying thank you to a woman. It’s opening the door for her. Pulling out her chair before she sits. It’s walking on the side of traffic when you two walks down the streets.” Before Curtis could finish what, he was saying, Brandon interrupts his father by saying; “Dad, girls these days do not care about that stuff. I watch music videos on cable, and I listen to my friends’ older brothers talk about girls. They all say the same thing. Girls these days are happy if you spend some time with them. They love it when you claim them publicly as your girlfriend. They want you to take them to parties and wear matching colors. If they get pregnant, they want you to claim the baby and act like a father. They don’t care if you don’t pay child support as long as you claim the baby. They only ask for child support when you don’t claim the baby. They want you to compliment them by saying they look cute or is fine as heck. They want you to be with them on their birthday and the baby birthday. You don’t have to buy a present. They will buy presents then tell their friends that you bought it. A girl especially loves you if you have a car. You see dad, I know how to treat a woman. The older guys in the neighborhood are always hipping us young guys to game on how to treat a woman.

    Curtis did not understand the last sentence his son spoke. He assumed it had to do with learning how to treat a woman from the older guys. “Son, I see you have your mind made up and it would be senseless for me to try to teach you what I was taught from my father when your mind is not open to receive. Later that evening Curtis had a talk with his wife about his discussion with their son Brandon. Gloria expressed to her husband in the most respectful way she could; “honey, I really don’t care about Brandon preconceived notions on how to treat and respect a woman. You are his father, not the neighborhood guys. I would like for you to take him on that camping trip without his friends. He does not get a say in whether he is going or not. For this household we will follow the principles of the bible. In Proverbs, chapter 22, verse 6 states: “Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it. What he is going through, and thinking is a phase that will constantly change based on the talk of the day from the neighborhood guys. We cannot shelter him from the world that surrounds us; however, we can counter some of the things he hears by allowing our voice to be strong among the other outside voices. It might appear at times that he is steering away from our voices or teachings; it’s okay, we must trust in God’s word that when he is old or wiser; he will not depart from the principles we taught him.” “I agree with you dear; I will let Brandon know that he has no say in this camping trip. In addition to following the principles my father taught me; I will take my bible so that we end each day at camp with bible study and prayer.”

    https://bookofrelationship.com

    https://a.co/d/0ZmyVKU

  • Press Release

    Headline

    Judy Owens’ new book, “The Secret Place” is an enriching life story of overcoming tragedies that caused great suffering, destruction, and distress.

    Summary of the release

    Recent release “The Secret Place” is an autobiography self-published book by author Judy Owens, whose tribulations transformed her faith to be stronger and unbreakable.

    Full release text

    Putting her life on print is going against everything she was taught about family secrets. Her family has always lived by the following mission statement: “what happens in our house stays in our house.” The goal in keeping the family secrets were to not embarrassed or make the family feel ashamed by letting people know who they are behind the mask. As an imperfect person coming from an imperfect family, Judy lived what she was taught for years.

    Judy Owens is a mother, and a grandmother, who is currently living in Texas. She is an avid reader who has always desired to share her wisdom in print. Judy’s love for reading began at the age of fifteen after reading her first book, The Diary of Anne Frank. Throughout the years, reading has taken Judy into a place of serenity, where she visions the world through someone’s creative thoughts on print. Judy’s hope is to encourage and enrich the life of the reader.

    The author aspires that through her work, everyone will be guided into healing, hope and the pathway leading to God’s kingdom.

    Readers can purchase “The Secret Place” at bookstores everywhere, online at Amazon, Barnes and Noble or Ingram Content Group.

    https://bookofrelationship.com

  • Party All the Time

    What to do when your business partners want to party all the time with the clients?

    Let’s talk about it…

    Euphoria Enterprise is an event planning company owned by Bella Cooper, Charity Jones, and Benjamin Black. The owners are all in their late thirties and single without kids. They met fifteen years ago in community college. The college instructor, Mr. Brown, divided the class into groups to work on business projects. Bella, Charity, and Benjamin were grouped together. Each individual group in class was asked to create a business from start to finish. They were allowed to make up any business of their choice. The purpose of the project was to determine how well they processed the material and lecture given to them throughout the semester in Mr. Brown’s business management class. The business project was their final test for the class. Bella, Charity, and Benjamin received an “A+” on the project. Because they work together well, the three vowed to come together after finishing school to turn their business project into a reality. Euphoria Enterprise was established ten years ago. Their business is very lucrative.

    Bella is the more level headed no nonsense person of the three. Bella feels her partners should be more business minded first before partying with the clients. Bella understands socializing with clients is good for the business; however, she feels there should be a separation between the two. She does not feel discussing the aftermath of a party during a business meeting is appropriate, especially when it is not business related. Although seventy percent of Euphoria’s clients are celebrities, Bella feels all clients should be treated equal. Her partners do not agree with her. For instance, Charity and Benjamin allow the celebrity clients to drink hard alcohol while doing drugs during the meeting. Bella feels once the contract is signed it is okay to celebrate with a glass of champagne; however, drugs should never be allowed in the office. It just is not good business sense. Perfect example; One celebrity client walks into the office smoking marijuana with his assistance carrying a fifth of Hennessy. The receptionist escorts the client to the conference room after informing Bella, Charity, and Benjamin of the client’s arrival. Bella walks into the conference room with her laptop. She greets the clients before sitting. Charity and Benjamin come into the conference room carrying glasses for the Hennessy this client is known for bringing to each of their meetings. This client gives many parties for family and friends as well as use the company to setup sceneries for their music videos. This client is interested in having a 40th birthday party for his homeboy slash bodyguard. According to the bodyguard who is present in the meeting, he would like for it to be a black tire dinner event from 7pm to 11pm for his family to attend. After 11pm he would like for the scenery to change to a Thug Life back yard party with a domino table, a spade table, an area for shooting dice, and a DJ with a dance floor. Bella knew this would be a huge bill because they would need to rent a large secluded mansion with a large backyard. They would need a chef to prepared an elegant dinner as well as finger foods for the backyard party. Bella noted the insurance coverage for the event would have to be large enough to cover the possibilities of damages. Her focus was on the backyard after party. Bella took notes of the details provided by the client for the event. She promises to have a written contract outlining the cost of the event within three days. As Bella stood to excuse herself from the meeting, Charity and Benjamin begin to discuss with the client the party they attended at the client home over the weekend. Bella shakes the client hand as she thanks him for his business. The client holds Bella hand; massage it gently while stating that he expects to see her at the afterparty. Bella smile as she pulls her hand from the client grip before exiting the conference room. Bella immediately starts to work on the client event. She assigns different task to their employees to find vendors, secluded mansion locations, and supplies. She asks them to include a breakdown of the cost for their findings. Charity and Benjamin spend an additional hour with the client drinking and laughing about the party they attended at the client’s home over the weekend. Three days later, Bella setup a zoom meeting with her partners and the client. She gave a short PowerPoint presentation outlining the details of the event with its cost. The client was pleased with the location and look of the mansion as well as all the details planned. Bella emailed a copy of the contract to the client for his signature. She asks that the client email back the signed signature page of the contract. She informed the client; work will begin upon receipt of the wire deposit. She also informed the client that the balance had to be paid in full before the date of the event. Later that day, Bella overhears Charity and Benjamin discussing what they were going to wear to backyard party.

    Bella was present at the mansion to oversee the setup. Once her plans were properly executed, she left her two assistants to work with the chef and to make sure the transition from black tie to Thug Life backyard party went well. After six hours, the two assistants were replaced with two more assistants who was responsible for locking up the mansion once the back yard party was over at 4am. Someone was scheduled to let the cleaning crew in at 6am so that the keys could be submitted back to the property management company, on the same day, before 4pm. All went well. There were only minor damages to a flower bed, some glass ware, and dishes. The insurance cover the cost of the damages. Charity and Benjamin both did not show up at work the following Monday after the event. Bella was concern. She left several messages on their phones without any reply. Bella continued to work as she waited for her partners to show up at work. Their client referred a female friend, who was at the Black tie / Thug Life party. She walked into the office without an appointment; she was interested in having a black-tie party for her parent’s 50th wedding anniversary. She loved the elegant details of the black tie and wanted the exact same for her parents. Bella introduced herself to the newly potential client as she escorted her to the conference room.  “Hello Bella, my name is Felisha; everyone calls me Peaches. You can call me Peaches.”  “Thanks Peaches, it is a pleasure to meet you. Would you like a bottle of water before we sit down to discuss what bought you in this morning?” “No thank you; but if you have some wine or champagne, I will take a glass.” “Sure, states Bella; would you like red or white wine?” “Red would be good, replied, Peaches.” After pouring wine into a glass, Bella and Peaches begin to discuss the details of the event she would like for her parents. As Bella was making notations of the discussion, Peaches asked is Charity and Benjamin okay after what happen at the backyard party. Bella froze in thought before being able to speak. Why do you ask are they okay? What happen at the back yard party that caused you to inquiry about their well-being? “Well, Charity and Baby Boy were hugged up all night. Benjamin kept following them around the backyard asking Charity if she was alright. Baby Boy got mad tire of Benjamin getting in him and Charity business. So, he told him that he was going to check him if he did not go somewhere and sit down. Benjamin tried to explain to Baby Boy that they own the company that put the event together and they do not get down the way they do. Baby Boy shouted at Benjamin saying, dude you are here partying hard like the rest of us. So now that your girl wants to be by my side, you want to act like you are better than me. You do not have enough money to be better than me home boy. At this point, Benjamin tells Baby Boy; you got us twisted, we are here as overseer of the property only. We are not here to indulge in any other activities. It is obvious you gave her something that is against our policy when socializing with our clients. Yeah right, replied Baby Boy, you could have fooled the hell out of me. I heard how you two get down in your office with the clients. Benjamin tried to reach for Charity who was looking like a Zombie when Baby Boy clocked him, laying him out. Suddenly Charity comes out of Zombie land. She runs out the backyard down the street screaming. Twenty minutes after she ran out, the police show up with the ambulance. At that point the party was over.” “What time did the police show up asked Bella.” “It was around 3:45am; As June Bug was leaving, he says; well, we got our money’s worth although the party ended 15 minutes early.” Bella thanks Peaches for the details of what happen. She informed Peaches her assistant will setup a zoom meeting to go over the contract. Bella escorted Peaches out the office. Later that day, Charity, and Benjamin walks into the office wearing sunglasses. Bella asked them both to come into her office. She demands to see their faces. Benjamin was covering a black eye and Charity was covering red eyes. Obviously states Bella, it had to be one hell of a party for you two to waltz in here three days later looking like you party all weekend. I do not want to hear any explanation; I need you two to listen only. Whatever you two need to do to get over being Star Struck or Celebrity Struck – DO IT! Because I refuse to work with partners who only wants to party with the clients. Please keep in mind we are not equal partners. I have no problem buying out your share to protect this company’s reputation. It took too long to build what we have here. Celebrities come to us because they like our work and trust us. Please do not tarnish the trust they placed in us by acting like possess groupies. You must understand that celebrities are people like you and I, who happen to be publicly known for their work. Complimenting their talent and paying to see their performance should be enough. Stop putting them on a pedestal because if they were not publicly admired for their talent, they would be looked upon as any other person. So, get over it NOW!